Our “Monster”, our baby girl, our pretty girl is gone.
I can’t believe it…..
We’ve been trying to will it that it wasn’t going to happen…we took hope that other’s kitties lasted longer with kidney disease.
She was at stage 4 and last 3-4 weeks we’ve been syringe feeding her the kidney food and giving her fluids. But the last 2 – 3 weeks, she wasn’t even going for her favorite non-vet food. She would lick the juices and that was it…..last 2-3 days, won’t even do that. She was occasionally drinking water, but no where near enough and we don’t remember the last time she was in litter box. She use to up to #12, she was down to #7.5 
Vets don’t try and tell you what to do when it comes to this…..they question you to make sure that you’ve thought it through. And when you are telling them what you saw and know, you know that you are making the right decision, even though you are 2nd guessing yourself because you don’t want it to be true, you want the vet to say they help get them through it. The questions were very annoying, but the vet we were seeing had to take a medical and this one didn’t know us or the case, otherwise I don’t think she would’ve questioned so much.
I believe the feedings helped keep her going, it helped to keep her personality. She still growled and swiped at the other kitties if they got to close, still demanded to be held in ToRn‘s arms at night after staring at the back of his head him to turn over or nose him in the middle of the night…….she got more cuddle time with him then I did. 
She was very much a daddy’s girl….very spoiled, never got in trouble doing the same thing Drew got in trouble for.
She growled and swiped at Gimli one last time before we left, we had her purring while we waited, her tail was even puffed up when we held her to say good bye.
She was a very unique cat.
When we first got her, we used to use clay litter and the 1st week I went to change it, I found poo in the open new bags of litter…..baby girl had found the fresh stuff.
The timing of when we got Sakura and Drew couldn’t have been better in 2008. We lost Reggie (our part Maine Coon former barn cat of Mom & Dad’s) a few months later, we lost ToRn’s brother Diesel the following summer and then we lost Alexis (the 1st kitty we got together) within a year of that….if it wasn’t for Sakura and Drew getting into things and making us laugh, we won’t have made it through it with our sanity intake.
She never liked her brother Drew….she would start a fight with him and then run to ToRn because she knew that he would keep Drew from getting back at her. Even last week, she was laying on me in bed and Drew won’t lay near me because she was there and she had growled at him.
Never seen a cat puff up for no reason….you just look at her and her tail would be as fluffy as a raccoon’s. Her eyes looked almost crossed eyed when she would go nose to nose with you. When she laid on her back, looked like a baby seal. She would purr so loud, it sounded as if she would blow a gasket. I’ve never seen a kitty that had coloring like that…..so black on the top coat and white underneath.
After she got out of the house for 24hrs when she was about 9 months, any time she looked out a window and saw humans she would growl at them. ToRn loved that. She got better since we did the RV thing for a few years….learn to get use to seeing people outside of the windows.
She killed 1, possibly 2 mice when living in Troutdale….1 confirmed kill, the other could be Drew’s…..but that is debate between us on that one. I woke up to the first one…..went to the bathroom at 0600, saw her laying on the carpet, purring as loud as could be….looking proud, saw that mouse, thought it was one the toys, went back to bed, laid there for about 5 mins thinking and realizing, that was no damn toy. Sure enough, when I moved the carpet it had a white belly with blood down it…..lol
She corned 3 mice in the RV that I had to catch. She couldn’t make my life easier and just kill them….eye roll.
I’ve been losing it on and off, missing the hell out of her…..and until we get her ashes back, I won’t get any sense of closure and be filled with anxiety that she isn’t back at home.
Love you Sakura, you will be greatly missed.
I wanted next week